Are you now in the position of making medical decisions for your loved one?
Do you know what is best for the person in your care?
When you are at your loved one’s doctor’s appointment, the doctor will talk to you about the medical aspects of the health decision – but that doesn’t mean that you are limited to thinking only about medicine. It may be important for you to consider the financial costs associated with the treatment plan hAe offers, of if the patient’s religion should play a role in the decision, and whether there are cultural issues that come into play. You will need to think about the overall picture of your loved one’s life. (For a list of questions you can use to when making medical decisions, you can download them from the resource page at TheCaregiversPath.)
It would be nice for the decision to be as simple as asking, “Will the treatment work and what are the side effects?” But life isn’t that simple. What if you were about to make a medical decision that allowed something to be done to the person’s body that was forbidden by their culture or religion? In that case, you may have chosen a certain treatment to save their life, but because the patient received that treatment, they believe they will no longer be able to move on to the hereafter. Yes, the medical decision was a good one, but how the decision will affect the patient’s life, based on their personal belief system, was not.
If the person you are making decisions for is very religious, then it would be good to find out if there are any religious rules or values that you should consider in your decision making. I know that when I work with my hospice patients, it is important to know if there are certain rites or blessings that have to be performed before the patient’s death. I don’t have to agree with what the person wants, but if I am the caregiver, then I need to do what I can to make sure their religion or culture is respected. I will need to call in the appropriate religious leader to take care of the spiritual needs of this person when the time is right. If the patient is not religious or spiritual, then you will need to respect this and leave religion out of the decision making process.
For most people, the financial costs of medical treatments will need to be considered or you may be putting the person in financial danger. You may be in charge of making only the healthcare decisions, but you should make sure that you or someone else checks with the patient’s insurance company to find out whether or not it will pay for the treatment in question and to get the proper authorizations. Don’t let a simple mistake – like forgetting to call the insurance company to let them know that your loved one was admitted to the hospital – put your loved one in financial distress. Making decisions without using the appropriate financial questions could literally bankrupt your loved one. Our goal to protect and care for the person in question should definitely include protecting his or her wallet.
When you look at the big picture of how your choices will affect not only the person’s body, but his or her life, you will feel more confident that you are making good decisions on their behalf.
Have a kind and respectful day.
Viki Kind is a clinical bioethicist, medical educator and hospice volunteer. Her book, “The Caregiver’s Path to Compassionate Decision Making: Making Choices for Those Who Can't,” guides families and healthcare professionals through the difficult process of making decisions for those who are losing or have lost the ability to think. She has also been a caregiver for many years for four members of her family.
